One of the most difficult dilemmas of parenthood (at least it is for me) is watching your children grow up while at the same time trying to hold on to them. For loving and overly protective parents like myself, you want to remain close to them while the child wants to become independent and distant. This is of course a necessary and essential part of the whole process of maturation. One loses contact, communication becomes strained and at times totally nonexistent, and irritation arises. The child wants to become himself and considers attention from the parents as encroachments on their privacy. "How was school today?" "Grumble... "What did you do?" "Moan..." "What's on your mind?" "Nothing..." "And..." "Just leave me alone!" The best thing to do is respect them as adults, let them be, and have the trust and confidence that all will in the end turn out all right. There is nothing else you can do as a parent, except perhaps guide and coach them ever so carefully from a distance and be there when they need you in difficult times. I am sure that this has happened a million times over throughout the history of mankind, but I have to experience it for myself.
Dilemmas of parenthood
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Graduated from Stanford 6-5-1979 ago.
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