Life is unpredictable in more ways than one.
Take for example my mood swings and the crazy things I end up doing out of the blue only to have to undo them afterwards (slight embarrassment).
Here is how it went. I just happened to come across a fantastic last-minute deal in the newspaper. The Vliegwinkel was offering a round-trip flight to San Francisco for only € 326 which is a fantastic deal when you think about it.
I went for it without thinking things out first. And then the big mistake was that I told everyone afterwards. Without thinking things out first. Dumb.
The reasons I thought of coming were simple: I just happened to find a cheap flight on the Internet and got all excited; and, I felt I needed a long-deserved break from this depressing life of not doing anything worthwhile. And of course I miss the family and friends pretty badly and just felt an urge to visit them again. Nothing wrong with that now is there?
Still, when one sits down and thinks about it logically, I should now be more focused (seriously focused, young man) on finding work here first. First and foremost. That is, before I can entertain the luxury of going to the California, bumming around and blowing even more money. Who do I think I am?
An aside: (My father used to have the somewhat annoying habit of getting some exciting plan in his head, announcing it to the whole family, promising everyone adventure and fun, but in the end not going through with it. This abrupt and often gruff cancellation was often at the very last minute, resulting in feelings of tremendous letdown from us the kids. I guess I must have gotten this trait from him. Could that be possible?)
So I'm afraid that I probably won't be going until the situation improves here. That could be some time, never or whatever, but who knows what the future will bring.
Hopefully I have not caused too much inconvenience and/or confusion to the family and friends involved. Mood swings beware.
Life must go on, I guess.
I remember the last time you returned from the states, you found yourself thrown into your current position in life. Maybe you need need another break to throw you into another place. My best and most refreshing vacation was when I was looking for a job and my wife sent me to spend a week with my family. It really was refreshing. Just... think about it. If you need a break you need to take it. I understand dedication and all of that, but people crack under all of that pressure. You need to let it out once in a while.
Sure makes a lot of sense. I will try and think about it.
Stu,
I tried to tell Kiffin the same thing, that he needed to do what was right for him ("you", speaking directly). My response from Kiffin, to be exact, is quoted in his November 3rd blog. I'm glad to see that someone else agrees with my thinking!
Kathleen (Kiffin's sister)