There are a number of rituals in life that can be conducted in order to cut the symbolic ties with the past. These rituals are always painful, but at the same time they are very necessary in order to move on in life. By nature, I am one who postpones the inevitable as long as possible, especially when it comes to distancing myself from my past. I remain very attached to the way things were, can get pretty sentimental about the most trivial memories, collect useless memorabilia and hate to throw anything away for fear of who knows what. Discarding items is so definite, and once they are thrown away, there's no way ever to get them back again.
Take for instance my computers and stuff. Believe it or not, I have saved every single computer, laptop, mouse, keyboard, router, hub, floppy disc, monitor, printer, scanner, cable, video card, hard disk, on and on. I still have my very first computer which is more than twenty years old. A state-of-the-art 386 PC and I was the first one in my neighborhood to have one. I also kept my very first laptop. A heavy bulk of a Toshiba shaped like an over-sized brick. All that hardware and cables have been collecting dust in dark corners, turning yellow and rotting away for ages, waiting to be let go. If only I would ever give them the chance.
So this morning I went through all my drawers, closets, boxes, and grabbed every piece of hardware and cable I could find. I carried those poor souls downstairs, filled the trunk of my car, the back and front seats. I went to the dump on the other side of town, and with tears in my eyes I tossed all those fine memories into the dumpster, watching them crash and splinter. There I was thanklessly discarding those wonderful pieces of technology which have meant so much to me. Thanks very much for being part of my life, good bye and see you later.
The big cleanup action took a little less than two hours. I've freed up so much extra room I do not know what to do with it all. Empty spaces waiting to be filled up again with the new fangled objects of my future. Like some kind of catharsis, I feel liked I've been relieved from a tremendous burden weighing me down. It's time to move on in life, stop getting dragged down by the past, face forward and reach out. Here we go again.
[This is my 2000th blog entry]
